And my sinus issues have returned.  I’ve posed this question to my FB friends with some interesting and helpful suggestions. But since I’m a poor grad student, I think it necessary to open up the floor to cheap sinus congestion hacks.

The topic of discussion is: cheap remedies for post nasal drip and sinus congestion

Suggest away, I am all ears and eyes.

 

So I’m back again. I know that was an unusually fast turnaround on my promise to annoy everyone with senseless posts. However, I totes forgot to add “get so sick I hurt all over” to my 2017 list. That’s my current sitch. Yanno, in case anyone was wondering.

What’s weird is that even though I feel like crap, I’ve been oddly productive. I’ve run stats, looked for post docs, drafted this post, paid bills, planned tomorrow. How long this procrastination fast will last, I’ve no clue. Stay tuned.

I’m like back or something. At least, I think I’m back for now.  This could be my annual obligatory post before I disappear into obscurity for another 360 + days. Who knows?

What to expect in 2017 if you have the (dis)PLEASURE of interacting with me in person:

  1. Bigger hair
  2. Bigger hair
  3. Even bigger hair
  4. My dissertation defense (Hopefully. FFS if I don’t defend this thing soon… *rolls eyes halfway around the planet*)
  5. Drunken stupor brought on by defense result. (either way I’ll be tore up from Hell’s gates up).
  6. Some sort of FAM BAM meetup stateside or in Narnia (Canada).
  7. Me begging folks for an undisclosed amount of sour gummies for every movie I want to see this year. That list is long.
  8. I’m going to make the 700lb club sometime this year. (Bout to pump, you, UP! *Flexes for the audience*)
  9. Learn how to add media to my WordPress posts without using up space. He he he. Been gone so long I don’t know how to do that. I’ll be good soon though especially if I actually make it back here to post again.
  10. I don’t really have anything else to add to the list.  My brain wouldn’t have been satisfied if I left it at 9. It just loves even numbers.

Resolutions listed and completed! Not even sure these are resolutions but I digress. What does your list look like?

It’s my final year in grad school. I’m really close but still far away from getting those three coveted letters behind my name. I’ve only worked five years for it and only lost about half my mind. I should be relieved but there is still so much left to do.  I have to land a post doc position, get a few more papers published, finish my dissertation and start the leaving process.

I only realized a few months ago what a toll this thing has taken on me.  I’m not the same person I was a few years ago. I am far more cynical and sarcastic. Don’t get me wrong, I was cynical and sarcastic before but not like this.  I smile way less. I used to smile all the time and when I do, I find that looking at those photos, the smile doesn’t reach my eyes. I have this characteristic twinkle in my eye when my smile is genuine that I’ve inherited from my father. I’ve had my body rebel against me during this time too. It’s like every fucking thing that could go wrong, did.Still is actually.

Shit hit the ceiling recently. Like my stress levels were at an all time high, my worst nightmare came true (well close to worst nightmare), and I currently live in a world where a giant citrus fruit is a US presidential candidate, the Kardashians are some sort of royalty, and Britain exited something willingly (the one place they weren’t asked to leave. Talk about ass backward!). I had to do something.

There were a few things that plagued me nightly.  My general discomfort with my reflection, the lack of time I took out for just me, and a sad, sad repetition of tasks that made me less productive all seeped into my dreams. As an ENFP, I loathe redundancy.  I was running out of steam, I was losing my spontaneity and  the larger than life audacious personality accompanied by the feigned drama I  took everywhere with me.  It was like I was losing the  awesome things about myself. That wasn’t good.  And while I love how much I’ve grown, how aware and in tuned I am with the issues that plague us as a society, my issues as a minority, and my role as an early career scientist (Holy SHITE, I am that now, whoa!), I couldn’t help but feel lost in the middle of nowhere, alone, isolated.

I decided it was time to simplify. That meant taking control of things I could. There’s still quite a few things that are completely out of my hands, but there were a few things that were.  I decided to make sure I had free time to be spontaneous. That was the easiest.  I started seeing a counselor, just to talk so that I wasn’t putting my heavy shit on my friends.  I started working out again, little by little.  The last thing and possibly most is that I let go of something that was weighing me down. Things are much better now.  Not stress free, I still have a lot to work on.  But for now at least, I can see a light at the end of the tunnel. That light wasn’t there a few weeks ago. I at least feel like I can dig myself out, or ride this crazy wave like a pro. #Pipedreams

light end tunnel

If I could adequately

describe

my outlook or expectations in the next few months,

I would tell you about a room

a waiting room to be precise.

 

There are no pictures here.

The walls are bare

There are no tables,

just one chair, its uncomfortable

I’d rather sit on the floor.

 

Were I honest,

I’d tell you I’d rather be

anywhere else, EXCEPT

that one other place people wait

till they can leave, Prison.

 

A self-made prison,

one I share with one other person.

They don’t know it’s prison.

In fact, for them, it’s home.

Its familiar and warm. Stockholm Syndrome.

 

This waiting room

is where I face prison, or freedom.

But there is nothing to do while I wait.

There’s nothing I can do while I wait.

And there are no pictures here to preoccupy my time.

-C.Dominique Gibson ©

we share the same past 

just a word not long ago 

a glance in passing …

-C. Dominique Gibson

Hello, it’s me again, and it’s the last few months of the last year of grad school. Someone’s going to give me a PhD. Sometimes it feels like a blur or a sick joke.

I must say that I’m absolutely over everything right now. I’m over everything mostly because there were some things that have happened that I’d never have predicted in 2011 when I started.

The first thing is my grandfather  passing away. I hadn’t seen him since about 2007. He passed away in 2013 and while I often find myself celebrating his life, I don’t have closure. I didn’t get to tell him one last time how much he influenced me and my thought process, how much his random calls, sometimes in the middle of the night while I was burning the midnight oil in lab meant and how much I loved him. He was my last surviving grandparent and I didn’t get to spend time with him for about 6 years.

So really, I’m over not having closure cause I was busy with grad school.

So yea … I’m totes over this ish.

 

 

 

 

Searched my archive, found

Posted: February 7, 2015 in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

This Haiku…

the quiet west was won
I stole it back from those nuts
now they are bitching…

To be honest I think they’re still salty 😅😅😅😅😅

This B is Just Plain Evil!!!

Posted: January 28, 2015 in Uncategorized

This is a classic, I have to bring this back up.

C. Dominique Gibson

LOL! Gotcha again!  The things I have to do to get people to read my blog.  But you’re here and that makes me happy!

Today, we discuss a necessary component in a good story, the antagonist, also known as the enemy, nemesis, frenemy, etc.

Traditionally, an antagonist is usually an actual individual.  But the enemy can be the protagonist’s environment, their situation and sometimes an inanimate object. Tolkien does crap tons of this in LOTR. While Sauron is the ultimate enemy throughout the trilogy, Frodo is also tormented by his environment and the heavy burden of carrying the ring.  In fact, after reading LOTR for the eightieth time, I asked myself, is the ring itself the actual antagonist?  I mean Sour – Sauron, was as much under the spell of the ring as everybody else.  But we can argue this all day, point is, the antagonist is not always apparent or…

View original post 655 more words

While I rejoiced at the fact that four actors where nominated for films that chronicle the life and times of two very notable scientists, Alan Turing and Stephen Hawking, I can’t help but agree with the sentiments of Black Twitter and proponents of diversity in the Academy.

It’s very eerie, a very strange feeling to realize that Selma was pretty much snubbed on the would be 86th birthday of the most notable Civil Rights Activist of the 20th Century.

I attended a lecture yesterday by Professor Marc Lamont Hill. Dr. Hill stressed how Dr. King not only spoke for the disenfranchised, no matter their race, but he first LISTENED. He considered the experiences of all people he came in contact with. And yet, a lot of us, have not learned from his example. I’ve had people who I once respected, lambaste me on my FB wall, for being empathetic and listening to the plights of the people, mostly Women and POC that I’ve come into contact with. They’ve marginalized my experience so that they could defend their positions. It’s sad, it breaks my heart, because it made me feel like that didn’t matter. As if these small injustices were ok if I could enjoy the half assed bounty and promise that everyone thinks is enough.

It’s so typical now, I laugh at it from time to time but back to Oscar.

The Oscar Nominations feature all white actors and actresses vying for the coveted gold statuettes. And while I am happy with the nominations of Benedict and Eddie because honestly those roles had to be difficult to sit in. The people they emulated are eccentric and complex and extraordinary. What I couldn’t ignore though, was the absence of David Oyelowo and the presence of Bradley Cooper? WTF? If I see him or Jennifer Lawrence playing themselves in film one more time…

Anyway, more importantly, #OscarsSoWhite is not solely about the lack of black representation at the Academy Awards, it’s about the lack of Asian, Native American, Chicano, Latino, and Hispanic representation. Where are the stories about these eccentric, complex and fascinating individuals that are being made but aren’t being seen or heard. Why are we not Listening?

The last Asian to be nominated for acting was Ken Watanabe in a supporting role.

I’d have loved to see Michael Pena (Love him) nominated for Cesar Chavez, or his supporting role in Fury.

It’s very disturbing that as diverse as the world is, Hollywood continuously forgets about other ethnicities when it’s time to hand out accolades.

I’ve heard someone say but that’s what Bollywood Awards, BET Awards, Black Reel, Awards and Hong Kong Film Awards are for.

See this would be all great and cool. Except, White people win those too.

SMH

End Transmission